ToDay I will b talking about my Idol. ^.^

Ok.... today's story... hmmmm....

I just read my idol's blog... hehehe... it was his brthday on the 6th of November... my dad's bday was on the 4th... and I just got to touch this blog thingy today. hehehe.... Paid the bills today, went to KLCC to close down my parent's line. ~Sighs~ With every minute passes by, a challenge comes by 1 after the other. I feel so swamped with what is happening, but I can't just take the easy way out. So I pray to Allah and hope for the very best.

muahahahaha!!! I will get through life, just wait and see.

My late grandmother used to say, it is not good to sigh. When you sigh, means you whine. When you whine, it is like you question to what the mighty Allah has given to you. I used to whine, really, I used to question, why am I here>? What am I doing? Why is my luck so rotten?Q@!!

This kind of whiningness, these questions, happened when I was back studying at the States. Boy, was I stupid back then. Another thing that was crossing my mind back then, I thought that if I was to go back to Malaysia, I'd be a typical shallow person. How bad is that?? Until, I was introduced to my Idol. My mom told me to look at him, watch him, see what he does, and learn. Mr Haji Aznil Nawawi is truly my idol. I have always wanted to be just like him. How he smiles everyday, doing his show with such strength and enthusiasm makes me see that if he can do it, why can't I. He makes me realize that Malaysian people are not shallow. I was. I was so shallow that I couldn't broaden up my mind to see that I was just too arrogant. Mr. Aznil is my Idol. Totally! My dream is if I could get to meet him. I would shake his hand and say THANK YOU!! THANK YOU MR AZNIL FOR OPENING UP MY MIND AND SEE A BROADER PICTURE. Hopefully, I get to see him one day. Even if a lot of people say that it's super easy to see him, well, if it's super easy THEN WHY IS IT SOOO HARD TO MEET HIM THEN!! Hahahaha... oh well, I'll just pray harder.

with a feeling of guilt....

Today's Mood: Guilty as HELL!!!


To my lovely dear sister.... Sara... I am really truly deeply sorry.... I didn't mean to forget your bday... Really, I am So SOOOOOORRRRRYYYY!!!! Not that I forgot, but I am not the kind of person that remembers these things... The post below was when I just opened up a blog, therefore, I really did forget to put in your name....

With this feeling of guilt.... this made me realize:


I am not a good sister


I am not a good friend either


I am not a good person



Bcoz I realize, not only did I not remember when Sara's bday is, but a lot of other people as well... Falzal's bday.... Amin Monopose... and probably a bunch of other people as well... what kinda person forgets these things... what kind of friend am I.... not a very good one... and the guilty feeling from something that happened like 20-30 minutes ago made me realize that... no wonder people see me as someone bad... no wonder people always say that I always look guilty.. because I am..

I'm guilty for not being a good friend

I'm guilty for not being a good sister

I'm guilty for not being a good person


No one to blame but myself....

oh n one more thing


R.I.P. Brian Picone... you're always known to be a great loving guy



~~Way to go Farah! -.- u shud b in bars~~

How bad the word 'pretend' is...

Today is the start of everyone's final exam. The UNITEN's students are all busy studying and taking their final exams. Some are taking their final final exams, as in after this, they would graduate and go on with a working life; and some are taking their sem's final exams where the next semester, there would be another time to take other kinds of final exams.

My finals start on Wednesday. This Wednesday I will be taking my Macro final exam. By the 6th November 2009 I would finish up my 2nd year degree. Next semester will be the start of my final year... How do I feel about that??? "LAakxkseqodnlxzza;kssldgjroepp["... exactly, no words to describe the feeling that I have. It's more like a dream than reality. BECAUSE the truth is, I am not ready to face the working world. In other words, I'm not ready to face reality. Especially when this means I will have more responsibilities, having to look for a job, yada yada yada, etc... no more using your parents money instead, we have to go look for money to give to our parents. To repay back all that they have done and all. Oh I just found a word for it, "DAMN".... that's the word, "DAMN".

Anyhu, so, today... Studied Macro since Macro's final exam is this Wednesday, but didn't really study. More like looking at the paper with a blank look on my face. Then after the so called 'studying', went home n SLEPT!! YES, that's right, I SLEPT!!!it was good to sleep and not think about anything but dream. So slept for like 2 hours I think and then went out to eat...

The word 'pretend' comes to mind a lot. I realized that when we have known somebody for like a long period of time, we tend to have moments where we would pretend. We pretend to be OK, pretend to be mad, pretend to be sad, pretend to be tired or lazy. However,the word 'pretend' gets really bad WHEN we pretend to be a friend. Pretending to be the bestest of friends or just pretending to like that person. This word is like acid. When we know someone that pretends, it hurts to see or even hurts to call them our friends. I know that one of my friends is right now going through a stage where she wants to change and become someone new. HOWEVER, when we change, we don't forget the people that were with us during our worst of times. We cherish them. Not putting them aside when we have gone through a good transformation and thinking they were the cause for our downfall. Those people that were by our side when we were not at our best, are the people that we should call friends and think of them as family. Because without them, who would really accept us for who we are. The people that suddenly becomes our friends when we have transformed, those people are the ones we need to put aside n be careful of. Pretending is harsh and sad, no one should pretend, its just bad.

Gonna go study now. TATA~~~!!!

Today's story

Today is my best frends bday.... NORFATHIN ROSLEY!!! hehehe.. happy bday 2 u buddy... she is now 21 years old... hahaha, she's allowed to drink n play. hahaha... i think she can vote now.. hehehehe... not sure... anyhu, well, its her bday today...

ok, lemme countdown how many presents I owe....

5th April : my lovely sis bday (paid for movies bt havent gotten her anything)
6th April : Hanee's bday (havent gotten her anything)

21st Sept: Chuya (havent gotten her anything)
Izza (havent gotten her anything)

1st Oct : Falzal's bday (havent gotten him anything)
11th Oct : Fathin's bday (havent gotten her anything)


so all in all there are 6 presents that I owe... the prob is I dont have the income to get them anything just yet... so they have to wait till I have the money to buy something. hahahaha...


my lunch for today is a very sad lunch indeed.... nasi + kicap + pedal = still hungry!! hahahaha.. o well, be patient, later2 i'll get something to munch on... hehehehe...

till the next blog we meet...

I realized something

Today is the 10th october.... One of ma sis (jr), she got the maxis free call the entire day today and since she's not using it, she gave us to use it. So ape lagi.... guna abes2 la.. hehehe... we called a bunch of people.... n it made me realize that if a couple of my friends from over the seas were here, id call them up and ask if they're ok or not... hehehe, called my police bro, my frend Danny, my juniors, Falzal my friend with benefit.. hahaha, called amin monopose... hehehe... monopose monopose....

i miss them... oh n i owe them as well... I wanted to buy them dinner or something, probbly one day I will. Coz theyve been real nice in checking out if there were tickets from KTN to KL.. hehehe, n i feel like i owe them for their kindness. I really do hope that they make it in the world of artists. their songs are not that bad, they're pretty good. One day, they'll be big n when they reach that level, I hope they don't forget their friends n fans.. hahaha...


in 2 weeks time are my finals... yay! finals... woah, havent studied.... said I wanted to be a nerd, but havent reached that term yet. Wanted to study my butt off, but my butt havent fallen off yet. Hahaha, gee, I always wished that I was like some other people who likes to study during their free time n if they feel bored, take out a book n just read. Im not like that, my free time is all about SLEEP N SLEEP N SLEEP... hahaha, n listen to songs n wat not... anyhu, hopefully I have the eagerness n will to study coz I dont wanna make ma parents look down on me especially when they have high expectations of me. anyhu, hopefully I do well this sem, especially when nex sem is the start of my final year. FINAL YEAR~~~!!! DAMN~~!!!~~~~ OMG~~~~!!!~~~~~ ok, dont wanna think about it now. think about it later. anyhu, till the nex blog we meet.

ProbLemS...

Sekarang ini pukul 3.43 pg... tick tock tick tock, the clocks ticking...

Yesterday ends, a new day begins... Drama drama drama... The old drama you keep, the new drama you gain... It seems like everyday, day by day, a new problem will come up. Whether those problems are with friends, family, or our own selves, the meaning still remains the same~~~ PROBLEM = DRAMA = TROUBLE = STRESS = UGLY!

Bila ada problem, ada drama. Bila ada drama, ada masalah. Bila ada masalah, dapat la stress. Bila da stress, pe lagi? hodoh la muke asyik bkerut je kje ny... aiyoooo....

But this is just a part of what life is about. Problems make our lives seem more interesting. What is a movie, if there is no problems to solve? What is a mystery if there is no mystery at all? What is a song, if there is no meaning? Problems make up our lives and without it life does not seem to mean at all. Even if there are people committing suicide because of the problems that they have, however, if we think it through real deep, if we had no problems, how dull would our lives be??

It is just a matter of solving it right. Whether you want it solved, or you feel the need to run away from it. Whether you think that problems are a hassle and that it just burdens and you can't move on with your life or you see it as just a part of your life and that you live through it. Who doesn't have a problem, a story to tell of how unlucky they are at times, their loved ones dumped them, the cheating, the backstabbing, parents divorce, the fighting... However, everything happens for a reason. When something bad happens, there's always something good that follows along with it. It's really a matter of looking closely.

Therefore, that's where friends and family come to place. When we feel down, either family or friends would cheer us up. Friends can be families, a place to tell them how sad we feel and what kinda boosting up the mood we need. I am lucky to have a family that even though there are TONS OF PROBLEMS (who doesn't??), my family stays strong together and that I have friends that understand me and accepts me for who I am, standing by my side day by day just so I can take in the experience of yesterday and look forward to tomorrow...


Smile~~~~ smile~~~~ and always keep smiling~~~~!!!!

My first blogger

Not much to type out today..... Abg ry (abg saman) is coming tonight.. hehehehe... hope it doesnt get awkward or anything.. hehehe...

anyhu, this is my first blogger... ermmm... im gonna set it up making it look nice n whatever.. ermm.. lemme see, what else can i put down here... hmmmm.. ooo today is Sara Amalina's Bday.. hehehe, i luv her to death.. muah muah.. ermm.. hmm, what else.. oooo i miss peggy, she hasnt replied back me emels, probably bz.. oh well... hehe, still miss her, still love her.. hehehe... well thats about it.. tatata....